World Suicide Prevention Day: What Helped Me Survive When I Didn’t Want To

World Suicide Prevention Day. A day to pause and reflect.

It’s a day that hits home for me, and one that makes me feel emotional, grateful, and, surprisingly, proud.

Why? Because I’ve been battling depression, anxiety, and Borderline Personality Disorder for more than a decade.

This might be a TMI article, so here’s a gentle warning for anyone who doesn’t want to read about mental health issues and suicide attempts.

During the hardest part of my journey, I had five suicide attempts. Two of those were very serious, the kind that altered the way I moved through the world. But I’m still here. They didn’t work. The monsters didn’t win.

And when I call them monsters, I don’t necessarily mean that in a cruel way. Think Sullivan from Monsters, Inc., big, scary-looking, but not without heart. That framing was actually one of the ways I learned to live with myself. By giving my struggles faces, personalities, and even needs, I stopped seeing them as enemies to destroy. Instead, they became parts of me I could extend compassion to. That shift helped me survive.

Now, I stand on steadier ground. I’m stable. I’m peaceful. I’m happy. I’ve been officially discharged by my psychiatrist. And though healing is never linear or “finished,” I want to share some of the things that helped me make it through the darkest chapters of my life. Maybe they’ll resonate with you, or with someone you love.

Stories

This one might sound unusual, but stories saved me. They raised me, taught me, gave me a reason to stay. Uncharted 4: A Thief’s End, A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara, Tolkien’s entire universe, Harry Potter, Charmed, One Piece, Attack on Titan, The Affair, The OA, Sense8, all of the Studio Ghibli films… the list goes on and on.

These stories gave me values to hold on to, characters to root for, lessons to carry. They became my companions when I couldn’t bear my own reality. When I got lost in their cottages, castles, or landscapes, I found a kind of safety that made my own mind a livable place.

They mattered so much that I even carry them on my skin, tattoos of the stories that shaped me, a reminder that they aren’t just in my head but part of who I am. I wear them proudly, on the inside and the outside.

Now, wherever I go, I carry that home with me. My stories will always be there.

Therapy

Of course. Therapy gave me language for things I thought were unspeakable. It gave me tools when my old patterns weren’t working. Most importantly, it gave me a space where I could be messy and broken and still be seen as human.

Compassion

My dad once told me something that changed everything:

“You give everyone complete forgiveness, except the person who needs it most: yourself.”

That landed like a thunderbolt. Slowly, I learned to offer myself the same compassion I so easily gave to others. That shift didn’t happen overnight, but it cracked open a door I had kept locked for too long.

A Support Network

People. Community. Connection. It doesn’t always look like dozens of friends, sometimes it’s just one person who picks up the phone, one friend who sits in silence with you, one therapist, one sibling, one hug.

But having people (and lovely, lovely pets) who reminded me that I mattered, even when I couldn’t feel it myself, made all the difference.

Love

Love is the ultimate superpower. Real magic.

And I don’t just mean being loved, I mean noticing love everywhere. In a friend’s laugh. In the way sunlight lands on your desk. In the wag of a dog’s tail. In a line from a song that feels like it was written just for you.

Once I stopped chasing love as something to get, and started noticing love as something that’s always present, my whole life began to shift.

I share this today not to glorify survival, but to remind anyone reading that healing is possible. That being alive is messy and hard and also wildly beautiful. And that even in the darkest seasons, you are not beyond hope. Nobody is.

So, if you’re struggling: please hold on. Your monsters are not your enemies, they’re parts of you waiting to be understood. And if you love someone who is struggling, know that your presence, patience, and compassion may be much more powerful than you realize.

And if you relate to this in any way, I want to leave you with an invitation: please reach out when you need help. Call a friend, text a hotline, talk to someone you trust, you don’t have to carry everything alone. Also, give yourself permission to find the stories that can hold you. Whether it’s a video game, a book, a sci-fi universe, a podcast, a movie, or even a single song on repeat, let those worlds become your home when your own feels shaky. They might just be the bridge that carries you through.

With much love,
Regina Zuniga
The Skin Deep Digital Content Specialist

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