From Pain to Power, Love Without Apology: Amir & Aamir on Rewriting Queer South Asian Love
When I sat down with Amir and Aamir, I expected a thoughtful conversation. What I didn’t expect was to leave feeling like I’d gained not only a new friendship, but also a powerful lesson in love, vulnerability, and the courage it takes to live unapologetically.
When I sat down with Amir and Aamir, a queer South Asian couple who recently took a seat in the iconic {THE AND} chairs, I expected a thoughtful conversation. What I didn’t expect was to leave feeling like I’d gained not only a new friendship, but also a powerful lesson in love, vulnerability, and the courage it takes to live unapologetically.
From the very beginning, they radiated warmth, humor, and honesty. What struck me most wasn’t just their chemistry as a couple, but their shared commitment to something much larger: using their voices, their art, and their relationship as a source of visibility and hope for queer South Asians everywhere.
A Podcast That Became a Lifeline
They told me about starting their podcast, You Don’t Love Me Boys, -without strategy, without agenda- just the two of them being themselves. What began casually soon transformed into something powerful: a mirror for queer South Asians who rarely see themselves reflected in love stories. “When we started our podcast, there was no intention. We just wanted to be ourselves", they said. But by showing up authentically, they ended up creating representation where it was desperately needed.
For a community where queerness is often reduced to shame or hidden behind closed doors, their openness is very much a love revolution. They shared how growing up, queerness was too often equated with lust, secrecy, sin, or rejection. Heteronormativity was the unspoken rule, and anything outside of it was shrouded in silence. Yet here they are, laughing, loving, and thriving together, proof that love can break cycles of invisibility.
A Safe Space to Grieve and Heal
Amir described their experience on {THE AND} chairs as entering “a different world,” one where the rules of everyday life fall away, and vulnerability is not only welcome but celebrated.
It was through this space that Aamir found himself grieving something he hadn’t allowed himself to before: the pain of being cut off from his family. “It was the first time I actually grieved that loss”, he admitted. For years, he had spoken about it in interviews or on stage, but the cards opened a door that allowed him to feel it, not just tell it.
Amir echoed that sentiment, explaining that the questions helped them name insecurities and fears that had always lingered in silence. Even the lighthearted prompts had a way of turning into tearful, soul-deep exchanges. “Some cards start light, but then suddenly you’re in tears together”, Amir said with a laugh. That combination of playfulness and depth is what makes {THE AND} so different, it’s not just a game, it’s a mirror, a key, and sometimes even a healer in disguise.
Living With Intention
Beyond the game, their {THE AND} conversation is a reminder of what it means to live with intention. Love, they explained, is not about checking off boxes or performing for others. It’s about abundance, about finding someone who supports your growth as much as you support theirs. Amir put it beautifully: “You don’t search for love. You focus on yourself and become abundant enough to let the right person arrive.”
As immigrants building a life together from scratch, they know firsthand that material circumstances shift, but what lasts is the love you choose to nurture every day. That’s what has kept them grounded, even in the face of hardship.
Humor as Resistance, Joy as Survival
Of course, our conversation wasn't all heavy. We laughed a lot. Amir had me cracking up with his descriptions of commuting in Brooklyn, calling subway rides “connecting flights” and describing local performers as “personal in-flight entertainment.” That kind of humor, woven with their vulnerability, is part of what makes their love story so magnetic. It’s also a form of resistance.
In a world that has tried to shrink them, their joy is expansive.
Their laughter is proof that love doesn’t just survive, it thrives, even in places that once made it feel impossible.
Why Their Story Matters
What I’ll carry most from our conversation is how seamlessly they embody courage and care. They’re not just telling their story for themselves, they’re holding open a door for the next generation. Their podcast, their art, their voices, and even their willingness to be vulnerable on camera during {THE AND} all serve one message: you are not alone, you are deserving of love, and you are enough exactly as you are.
For queer South Asians, for anyone who’s ever felt unseen, that message is everything. Sitting with Amir and Aamir reminded me that visibility is not just about being looked at, it’s about being known.
And as they sat across from one another under the soft lights of {THE AND} chairs, it was clear: this was more than a conversation. It was a celebration of queer South Asian love, tender, brave, and radiant with joy.
Watch their full conversation and witness their love unfold.
And if you’re ready to explore what joy, identity, and connection mean to you, play the {THE AND} x GLAAD: Queer Joy Digital Deck - a celebration of the questions that make us feel most alive.
Regina Zuniga,
The Skin Deep Digital Content Specialist
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